Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Obvious Steroids User 8/4/09

So I missed my first Monday OSU post. It was bound to happen. I bet you had an over/under bet on when I would finally miss the weekly post.

I was all ready to write it last night around 7 after spending all day playing MLB 2k9 with Dave. (Note to everyone, Ben Zobrist is the greatest hitter of all time) Then Dave discovered that he did not have to work the sports newswire, so we decided to hit up the Pub II, and the rest is history.

Plus, this week's Obvious Steroids User was in the news last week, so posting yesterday would have already been outdated. I was going to post something when the news about the Red Sox broke last week, but I thought I would save it for this posting.

The newest member of the OSU club is David Ortiz.

Yes, everyone saw this one coming. It was completely obvious.

In Minnesota, he was a platoon player who never hit more that twenty homers in one season. Then all of sudden after arriving in Boston in 2003, he jacked eleven more home runs despite only playing in three more games than the previous year. His slugging percentage rose almost a hundred full points and Big Papi rode the juice to a fifth place finish in the MVP voting.

From there, things just got ridiculous. 2004 - 42 HR; 2005 - 47 HR; 2006 - 54 HR!!!

Oh wait, and what is that... 2007 - only 35 HR in just two fewer games than in '06. Of course, we all know about his struggles since then since ESPN has been there to promptly cover all of Ortiz's slumps and injuries.

My favorite part of the the entire Big Papi situation is that everyone in Boston saw this coming all along. The gorgeous Sarah Green of umpbump.com wrote this piece after the news of Big Papi's positive test broke last week. And it looks like Bill Simmons will be having some akward conversations with his son about that 2004 World Series title.

The thing I hate is that the Cardinals were absolutely sick in 2004. They should have won that World Series, but alas, fate intervened for the Red Sox. Or was it that just a shit ton of doping intervened? Look at these scores from that Series. There are some tight scores. Without a doped up Ramirez and Ortiz, do the Red Sox take that title? I don't think so. However, being biased, I'm going to completely overlook the years the 36-year-old Reggie Sanders, 37-year-old Larry Walker, and 33-year-old John Mabry had that year.

Anyways, check out these before and after shots of Big Papi and get ready to close the book.



Welcome to the club David Ortiz.


  1. I think Cooly should go on steriods and try and make the Cardinals roster next year just so we can take before and after pictures.

  2. The photos will be deceiving since I will end up slimming down.

  3. I demand a Nolan Ryan blog. You should do a feature on badass former players.

  4. We are working on a doosy (sp) of a post about badasses.