Monday, September 14, 2009

Obvious Steroids User 9/14/09

Football has been consuming far too much of my time over the past two days (good work, Fins). So you know what time it is... that's right... fuckin' lazy post time.

When I sat back and thought long and hard about this past weekend, two events stood out the most to me. The Serena "I'm finna shove this racket up your ass" moment and the Kanye-too-loaded-with-Hennessey butt-in. That got me to thinking of one of my favorite outbursters of all time, who happens to also be an admitted steroid user.

That person is none other than the irreverent JOHN ROCKER.

So at this point, I'm going to open this puppy up as a forum for everyone to post his (or possibly, but unlikely, her) favorite Rocker moment(s) of all time.

My personal favorite is his classic quote when Rocker was asked in SI whether or not he would play in New York:

"I'd retire first. It's the most hectic, nerve-racking city. Imagine having to take the 7 Train to the ballpark looking like you're riding through Beirut next to some kid with purple hair, next to some queer with AIDS, right next to some dude who just got out of jail for the fourth time, right next to some 20-year-old mom with four kids. It's depressing... The biggest thing I don't like about New York are the foreigners. You can walk an entire block in Times Square and not hear anybody speaking English. Asians and Koreans and Vietnamese and Indians and Russians and Spanish people and everything up there. How the hell did they get in this country?"

The last sentence is certainly the cream of the crop when he mentions "Asians and Koreans and Vietnamese and Indians." Apparently, John was not too savvy on his 6th grade world geography.

Welcome to the only club that will accept you other than the mental institution, John.

PS - How did it take almost three months for this blog to necessitate a John Rocker tag? I'm ashamed.


  1. Great post. We should all strive to be more like John Rocker

  2. I liked Rocker in Pros vs. Joes. He is still a dick

  3. Wait, John Rocker hated gays?!?!?! I would not believe this if this wasn't such a credible website.

  4. That picture doesn't make me believe John Rocker hates gays.

  5. Ego is in all men, big or small. You are both fucking morons.