Wednesday, February 17, 2010

My Absence Cannot Go Unpunished

Gents and Scalawags, I understand that my absence recently has left you questioning your man-hood, child hood dreams, and sexuality. I get that, I'm the object of your obsession. Why was I away from the blog so long? It's absolutely not because I was looking at porn and got a computer virus. Whomever is spreading that rumor is a bold faced liar.

I have the real reason I could not post on the blog, and you can find the answer in this fantastic commercial. You are not mistaken folks. That is El Duque filming the greatest cameo in commercial history. Why would Airless Water Valve want a washed up pitcher who has been retired for 3 years? No one may ever know. What I do know is that I'm still impressed by that fantastic leg kick.


  1. That commercial is awesome. I'm going with the fact that no one knows his age, he probably still tells people he is 23.

    I heard you did get a computer virus from looking at porn

  2. Scott Peterson may agree with you on that

  3. Are you claiming that you invented the airless water valve?

    Another thought - Dave and I were watching this last night, and the beginning is hilarious, as the host never refers to El Duque by name. Do you think they were actually targeting someone else to endorse their product? And who? Livan Hernandez maybe?

    Lastly, no more mentioning of Scott Peterson on this blog, please. He is a very Chicago-centered news story, and I don't want to scare away our massive amount of non-Chicago readers.

  4. Cooly and all non-Chicago area resident followers, I am sorry to offend you all by brining up something that not everyone may know about (even though I am pretty sure it is national news by now). Although I am worried about the same repercussions I am going to mention it anyway.

    Has anyone heard more about the White Sox reality show on the MLB Network?